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Writer's pictureOcean Antin

**The Journey of Rediscovering Our Voices: A Reflection for Trans Vocalists**

Updated: Oct 8, 2023


For trans vocalists, our narratives often bear the weight of silenced voices, much like the character Ani in "Luckiest Girl Alive." These stories of trauma, suppression, and self-doubt have shaped us, but they do not define us. Together, let's explore the path toward rediscovering our voices, acknowledging that our struggles are real, and ultimately amplifying our unique, powerful voices.


My own journey through trauma and self-discovery bears its unique marks, distinct from the character Ani in "Luckiest Girl Alive," yet echoing with a resonance that speaks to many who have faced adversity. As a transgender trauma survivor and a Toronto Voice Teacher, I've found strength in embracing my truth, and I'm here to share my story.


The Early Years: A Foundation of Coping


My trauma narrative, like so many others, began at a young age. While it may not mirror the experiences of Mila Kunis' character in the movie, it cast a long shadow over my formative years. As a child, I witnessed and endured abuse. The people who should have been my pillars of support were unable to provide it, entangled in their own struggles and complexities.


In the wake of these traumatic events, my life became a series of coping mechanisms. I found myself retreating into dishonesty, playing roles, and saying what I believed others wanted to hear. Survival instinct, it seems, has a way of pushing us into behaviors we never imagined.

The Weight of Silenced Voices


For many of us, our journey as trans individuals has been fraught with challenges and obstacles. We've encountered societal expectations, prejudice, and discrimination, all of which have sought to silence our voices. Much like Ani, we've navigated a world that diminishes our identities and dismisses our truths.


Acknowledging Our Trauma


It's essential to recognize that the trauma we carry is not "in our heads." The pain we've experienced is real, and its impact on our lives is undeniable. Trauma has a way of seeping into the very fibers of our being, shaping our self-perception, and influencing our choices. We must acknowledge that our struggles are valid and worthy of attention.



Healing and Self-Acceptance


Healing begins with self-acceptance. Embracing our trans identities and the unique journeys that have brought us here is a critical step toward healing. We are not defined by the traumas we've endured, but rather by our resilience and our unwavering commitment to authenticity.



Amplifying Our Voices


As trans vocalists, our voices are our instruments of self-expression, resilience, and empowerment. It's time to reclaim them. Here are some steps to help us amplify our voices:


1. **Seek Support**: Reach out to trans-friendly therapists, support groups, or mentors who can provide guidance and understanding as we navigate our traumas.


2. **Self-Reflection**: Take time to reflect on your journey and the unique challenges you've faced. Journaling or creative expression can be powerful tools for self-discovery.


3. **Artistic Expression**: Embrace the arts as a means of self-expression. Singing, writing, painting, or any creative outlet can serve as a cathartic release and a channel for our voices.


4. **Community**: Connect with others who share similar experiences. Building a supportive community can provide a sense of belonging and affirmation.


5. **Vocal Training**: Consider vocal training to explore the full range and potential of your voice. This can be a transformative experience, both artistically and personally.


Embracing Our Unique Voices


In the grand tapestry of life, we are the authors of our narratives. As trans vocalists, our stories are powerful, complex, and deserving of recognition. The trauma we've endured has shaped us, but it does not define us. Through self-acceptance, support, and artistic expression, we can begin to heal, rediscover our voices, and amplify them in a world that needs to hear our truths.


Together, we can create a chorus of voices that celebrates authenticity, resilience, and the beauty of being our true selves. Let our stories be a testament to the strength of the human spirit and the power of embracing our unique voices.



“An approximation of honesty won’t make the cut.”


****Thank you, Jessica Knoll, for telling this (your) story. I am beyond inspired. ****


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